Enjoying the feel of the fabrics, I dress enfemme to Dress Up, to go out looking good, or at home because it's another way to enjoy life, but always completely dressed for my gender role-of-the-moment (no underdressing!). I'm as likely to resemble a soccer mom in '50s drag, as I would enhomme as a hippie-biker in cowboy boots. I don't do this in order to hang out with other crossdressers (much less a convention room full of them!) - my tolerance for "poor, poor, pitiful me, nobody understands me" is very, very low, and being a cheapskate, I don't play the "how much did I spend on my CD gear" game. Stepping out shopping, or to a mainstream event such as a show, play, or fashion event is just as much fun with galpals as an evening out at Prism or Boots anyway - or more fun, as I don't appreciate crossdresser's karaoke (also known as drag shows).

Politics? Religion? I'm Catholic, and can play Bible quotes with the best of the born-again. My own beliefs cross the universe of redneck-to-bleeding-heart attitudes, and I've seen that GiBLeT outreach is mostly presented to a converted audience (that said, I'm a compulsive volunteer, in keeping with local tradition). I neither "pass" nor see myself as a member of an oppressed minority; rather, I interact and do get a chuckle out of watching the general public react. (A hint: most don't.) Crossdressing is something I do to enhance my life, rather than living to express my femininity.

Everyone has Other Interests. I'll admit to being a sorry, pussy-whipped wretch who loves, and enjoys hanging out with Milady, to the point where "Yes dear" has become our bywords for the last seventeen years. After several years of powerlifting and karate, I'll hop on my bicycle at any excuse, have a generally active outlook, read a lot (sci-fi for popcorn, words-in-a-line for any other reason), and greatly enjoy the sensual experience: food, visual beauty, music, the feel of stockings and lace... All beautiful, all worth experiencing to the fullest. A certain confidence coupled with a bit of devil-may-care has gotten me into a few rewarding experiences, and the laughing factor is really high.

I'm singularly blessed to be a smaller person, fit and with good skin, nails, and hair; at 165cm and 70 kilos (5'5" and 155lb, for the unmetricated), I manage to fit most size 10/12 outfits. There are a lot of nice tarty pieces of apparel out there, but one has to be realistic - a woman in her fifties doesn't really slut it up too heavily anyway. (Okay, critics, I do occasionally slut it up...) My own focus is and always has been stockings and high heels - ever since I discovered a french-lingerie calendar at 13, I've kept an honest fascination with those delicate bits. Milady has a fine collection, some of which came from me - there's little to compare with the feeling of hugging one's lover while both attired in slinky bits. Jewelry, be it Austrian crystal or the more contemporary bits, is also a joy - it adds something to any shopping trip. Milady tells me regularly that she has dibs on my collection when I purge - a given. But will I purge? Judiciously, one would hope. The galpals who visit tend to ook greatly over my collection, but there has to be an upper limit - perhaps whatever can be crammed into a three-foot cabinet...

I've been involved in a few newsgroups and forums, have bought and read the appropriate publications, and, of course, interact with other genetic males who look darn good in femwear. I notice that many if not most crossdressers started doing their thing quite early in life. Some suppressed it, others hid it. Some deal with pretty severe repercussions from spouses, family, and the outside world, and my heart goes out to them - the art of negotiation isn't. Those in smaller centres have far less opportunity to be themselves; some of the more citified have corporate pseudo-morality going against them.

Yes, I do realize I haven't had those angst-ridden formative years, but I can't see how I'd miss them. I had my own angst - a little, mouthy person who got picked on a lot - which grew me up into what I am now. I feel that attitudes towards crossdressers and drag queens are softening overall, and the reactions I get when out enfemme are neutral to positive... so here's my advocacy: that's what showing pride is all about. You are as beautiful and strong as you want to be. I'll admit to having an agenda - to see as many crossdressers as possible out and about, happy, confident, and accepted. Anyone can do it.

An issue I see is the continuation of this magnificent obsession into deep waters. I speak of those who would deny their masculine selves by taking that next step into transsexuality. I consider that choice to be a foolish one - regularly seeing friends turn into nasty fools because of the drugs is no fun - but it's not my battle. Neither is any form of cosmetic surgery, or even attempting to dress as a girl for 24/7. I grow my own hair and nails, in keeping with my established lifestyle of natural growth and consumption. Crossdressing is a joy; one need not attempt to discard one's masculine self when presenting as a woman. The duality of crossdressing is yet another of those wonderful things to explore - after all, one's attitudes and outlook will reflect a male upbringing; it's those you change that really make you a lady when you need to be, and more of a whole person. Transvestism is about changing your clothes. Transsexualism is about changing your body. Transgender is about changing your mind .